Adapting to brain change begins with recognizing a powerful truth: dementia is not one-size-fits-all. Different forms of dementia – like Alzheimer’s, Lewy body, or frontotemporal dementia – can impact the brain in distinct ways. But even within the same diagnosis, no two journeys are identical, because every person carries their own life story. The way a person experiences dementia is deeply shaped by their personality, history, culture, values, and environment. That’s why supporting someone with dementia isn’t just about understanding the cognitive changes – they matter deeply – but also about knowing the person behind those changes. When we see both the brain and the individual, we’re better equipped to offer support that’s not only practical, but also compassionate and deeply respectful.
It’s also important to note that dementia is not just memory loss – it’s a progressive shift in how the brain processes information, emotions, and the world around it. As different parts of the brain are affected, a person’s abilities, preferences, behavior and routines may change. This isn’t intentional. It’s neurological.
Let’s look more closely at some of the changes that happen and why it’s important to adapt to them:
What is changing for the person with dementia?
Language – Comprehension and Expression
The way a person takes in information, how they process the information, the rate in which they process information and then how they respond to it changes. This can include difficulty finding the right words (word-finding difficulties), using incorrect words, repeating phrases, or struggling to understand what others are saying.
Memory and Orientation
A person might not remember yesterday but vividly recall something from decades ago. They may not remember the steps for doing something but can carry out tasks that are more habitual in nature. Individuals may become confused about the time of day, date, year, or their current location, even in familiar environments. They may believe they need to go “home” when they are already there.
Emotional Regulation and Reactions
Brain change can heighten sensitivity or dull filters. A person may struggle to recognize what is socially appropriate behavior and what is not. They may use language that had not routinely part of their vocabulary, such as curse words when they are frustrated.
Sensory Processing
Sights, sounds, and textures might feel overwhelming, distorted or very uncomfortable. A person may show a tendency toward seeking soothing sensory input by rubbing or feeling things with their hands. Nutritional intake can be challenging with an increased desire for sweet and salty. Improperly fitted hearing aids and glasses can be more irritating than helpful.
Decision-Making, Judgment and Planning
Changes in decision making, judgment and planning are the result of changes in the prefrontal cortex. This is the “command” center for executive functioning skills. These are the skills that help us to stay safe and anticipate consequences of our actions and generate solutions.
Fluctuations in Clarity and Confusion
Brain change doesn’t follow a straight path. There are times when confusion is high and times when a person appears crystal clear in their thinking skills. Sometimes we see patterns – “Mom wakes up in the morning and seems a little disoriented but as the day goes on she gets better. We almost wonder if she has dementia at all. Then by late afternoon, there is no doubt. She is a mess!” There are several possible explanations for these fluctuations but do note that they happen, and it may look different from one person to another.
Changes in Physical Ability
Early in dementia we see gross motor and fine motor coordination are pretty well preserved. It does however depend on the type of dementia and certainly other forms. As dementia progresses, we will see gross motor skills preserved longer and the loss of fine motor skills sooner. Think of gross motor as getting up from a chair, walking, dancing, running, reaching, bending, grasping. Fine motor skills look like tool use, writing, manipulating things with our fingers. In addition to the gross and fine motor changes, we also see changes in balance and energy levels.
Way Finding
While memory is often cited as the first noticed symptom of dementia, so is way finding. The most common report starts to get lost, when traveling a route that has been very familiar.
Who needs to adapt and adjust to these changes?

We Do!
The healthy brain can make adjustments. The brain of a person living with dementia is unable to. It is unfair and unrealistic to expect a dying brain to shift in the way that a healthy brain can.
Benefits of adapting and adjusting:
1. Strengthened Relationships
When we adapt how we listen, respond, and engage, we reduce conflict and increase trust. Adapting lets us stay in the relationship, even as the nature of that relationship changes.
2. Reduced Distress for Both Everyone
Flexible support decreases confusion and anxiety for the person living with dementia—and eases frustration, guilt, or burnout for the care partner. Everyone breathes easier. Unmet needs are better able to be addressed.
3. Enhanced Safety Without Sacrificing Dignity
By shifting routines, simplifying choices, or modifying environments, we create safer experiences that still honor autonomy.
4. Increased Moments of Joy and Connection
Adaptation clears the path for shared laughter, reminiscence, and calm. Even when memory fades, emotional memories linger. Our flexible approach makes space for those beautiful, affirming moments.
5. More Effective Communication
Meeting the person where they are – in words, pace, or tone – leads to more understanding and fewer breakdowns in conversation.
6. Empowerment Through Remaining Abilities
By adapting our expectations, we highlight what is still possible. This promotes a sense of purpose and helps avoid learned helplessness. This also creates opportunity for more meaningful engagement.
7. A Culture Shift Toward Compassionate Care
On a broader level, adapting maintains that the person living with dementia is being treated with respect, dignity, and given a choice in how and what they experience. It sets a tone of compassion and understanding that evolves as needs change.
What happens when we are inflexible?
Rigid routines, unrealistic expectations, and stigma cause unnecessary frustration, isolation, and even harm.
As a dementia care consultant, I focus on identifying and nurturing the abilities that remain, using them as a foundation to sustain quality of life. This includes supporting meaningful engagement in activities, fostering personal connections, and creating space for joy. To truly make this possible, we must meet individuals where they are – understanding their current abilities and needs. By adapting our approaches and reshaping how tasks are done, we can ease stress and minimize frustration for both the person living with dementia and those who support them.
How do we adapt and what should we do differently?
To learn more about HOW to adapt and adjust to brain change, check back. I will address this in a future post. If you are trying to support someone living with a dementia or mild cognitive impairment and wonder if more guidance would be of benefit, please reach out for a free consultation. You can find a link to schedule below. I would love to walk this journey with you and give you and your loved one the best possible support!
Resources
- http://www.alz.org
- http://www.dementianc.org
- http://www.teepasnow.com
- https://alzheimer.ca/en/help-information/im-living-dementia/managing-changes-your-abilities

